pfft

now why would u want to do that?

[edit] Warning: Long post below! [/edit] :)
Here are a few more ingame goals. Most are pretty easy, but strangely, many players have not completed them. They may not be your idea of fun, though. :)
1) Buy a mispriced expensive item (Mr. As work well), then give it back to the seller.
2) Send someone who's having a 10 meat (or otherwise cheap) sale a thank you note with a pretty flower.
3) Get accepted into a clan you can enjoy - be it a friendly clan, a large clan, or a clan that's about e-penis - whatever you normally go for.
4) Make 10 million meat in a single day playing the mall, other than on special game occasions (It was easy on Crimbo, just after rollover).
5) Donate $10 to Jick. It helps keep the game running. :)
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On topic, something often not covered (or partially covered) in how-to-make-meat guides is how to play the bear market. If you don't know what that means - try this guide:
For most newer players, investing starts small. Your starting stash of meat is likely to have paid for your mall store, and you're almost broke. The tendency is to sell whatever items of value you have, a little lower than the current high price. Often, players will only sell off 'useless' items, such is gravy fairy, cooking ingredients, and the like. While that is sometimes correct, it is better to do some research first.
Consider the following situation: On Crimbo, I got a dreidl in my stocking. Since I'm attached to my current familiar, Volf the Volleyball, I did not use the dreidl - but I did not want to sell it just yet. Over the course of a few days, the price of dreidls went down to roughly 2 million meat. Then, a few days ago, prices jumped to nearly 4 million. Since I was fairly sure there was no in-game reason for this jump, I placed my dreidl in the mall for 4 million, and it sold within a few moments. Two days ago, dreidls were back below 2 million meat, and I got myself a new one.
Another obvious example is Little Paper Umbrellas (LPU). A few moments after the properties of the new Tiny Plastic Swords were established, it was obvious LPUs would crash eventually. I immediately unloaded all of mine for a fair bit below the mall standard, to make sure I get out in time. I was bought out, and the buyer placed my LPUs for sale in his store for the mall standard. As far as I know, they're still there. :)
The main thing to keep in mind when playing the Bear market is that, if you make a mistake, you might end up without an item you want. This can often be even worse than losing some meat, at least to me. So make sure you do your homework and find out *why* prices are higher at the moment, and what is likely to make them go down again.
To summarise, this method is basically the reverse of 'buy low, sell high' - First, you sell high from inventory, and then you replace it by buying low.

In my quest for a pail (still 45 million away) I have discovered that selling Bartenders In a Box get lots of meat....