THE GODDESS’S KNIGHTS

Founded by SexyGoddess, presumably in July 2004. Much like KOL Addicts, The Goddess’s Knights took advantage of the massive influx of new players in the spring and summer of 2004 to build its ranks, quickly reaching well over 1,000 members and becoming one of the largest clans in the game. One might walk into channel /newbie on a given day and find literally dozens of Goddess’s Knights members in the room. TGK funneled a fair bit of its funds into clan warring, although they were never top-shelf.

The Goddess’s Knights had a Karma ranking system much different from that of many other clans. Instead of logging karma based on stash donations, SexyGoddess encouraged her members to donate to her, personally, and managed their karma in an Excel spreadsheet. This was not exactly uncommon practice, especially in the post-Black Sunday era; many clans wanted to keep their meat reserves somewhat liquid, and meat donated to clan stashes is unrecoverable, so some clan leaders personally managed their clan’s finances. However, in addition to making the clan more powerful, it also makes the clan leader personally very rich, and, in the case of the Goddess’s Knights, foreshadows the troubles to come.

        Through fall 2004, SexyGoddess became increasingly distant from the clan, logging in less often and ignoring clan business. Sporadic disputes broke out 
between clanmates as to the clan’s future, and its dubious leadership. On December 6, 2004, a full-scale revolt occurred. Led by J1mmy, Btrfly9IRL, and 
panamajack, a group of insurgents broke off and formed a splinter clan, The Ugly Ducklings. J1mmy sent an email to all members of the TGK forums, in which he 
wrote,
 
                    “I joined TGK when it was a small clan of less than 100 members and I liked the unique ideology of the clan. If you worked hard and helped out you could earn promotions, 
help govern, be heard and accepted as an equal…. As time has gone by, the clan leader SexyGoddess seemed to lose touch with the clan…People are leaving in record numbers; there is 
a general air of discontent among many members.
                    I feel at the moment TGK has a cancer, a cancer that could have been cured but
one that was not allowed treatment….Many members of TGK feel that the current situation can not be improved and TGK will remain stagnant. A new clan has been set up. This clan is 
based on the original ideas behind TGK and will hopefully become what TGK should have been, a clan where every member has a say and is run by a democracy not by autocracy.”
 
               Upon logging in and finding her clan in a virtual civil war, SexyGoddess promptly burned millions of meat on a massive clan war spree (including a very 
successful attack on Crazen Markay’s Madmen), booted everyone from her clan and deleted it.
               The Goddess’s Knights was re-formed later, by Syntaxes, and has only a handful of members; The Ugly Duckings continues to flourish, and most of the 
active members of TGK have found their way there. 

Major Members:

-SexyGoddess (#124654) – Founder and leader of The Goddess’s Knights until its meltdown. SexyGoddess was a Radio KoL DJ, and a sultry regular in chat. Sometime in November or early December, 2004, she lost her radio show after leaving the mic and broadcasting two hours of dead air. She then formed an “Underground Radio KOL”, and advertised it heavily in chat channels; the experiment did not fare well, and after a few weeks of paltry listenership, she gave it up.

SexyGoddess leaves behind a troubled legacy. She was intensely disliked by many players for what they saw as brashness and sexual ostentation; however, she had built up a huge contingent of players who were happy to be clanmates with her. After deleting her clan, she began offering to sell her account and rares on Ebay for hard cash; the chat logs of this happening were preserved by Capt_Itchynutz. There was a mass public outcry over this news, and she has not been heard from since.

-J1mmy (#125889) – hosted the TGK forums before they were wiped out; currently hosts the boards for TUD. J1mmy was one of the major leaders of the insurrection that rent TGK in twain. He was, and is, very active in attempting to restore to The Ugly Ducklings the familiarity that The Goddess’s Knights once enjoyed in KoL.

-Btrfly9IRL (#201182) – major clan administrator. Currently in TUD.

-gnilrets2 (#127836) – major clan administrator. Currently in TUD.

-mat (#12454) – major clan administrator. Currently in TUD.

-ChefboyarTEKE (#136473) – Formerly a major clan recruiter. Currently in TUD.

-Capt_Itchynutz (#93108) – PvP hit organizer for TGK. Capt_Itchynutz saved the chat logs of SexyGoddess’s last words to the KoL world. They were not pretty. Currently in TUD.

-n00beast (#183257) – familiar chat lurker and forum poster.

-Mytzlplx (#167924) – major clan administrator.

-panamajack (#241804) – major clan administrator. Currently in TUD.

-Meta_Hyper_Ism (#240528) – major clan administrator. Currently in TUD. He is also known in-game and on the forums as Percieved 373k (#240576). He notes of his old clan:

The idea of having 1400 members was thrilling. The potential to affect the game, either through market manipulation as a way of getting around limits, or just organizing programs to help each other out, seemed very possible. Anach (#260452) was the push behind the desire to affect the market. This never did really pick up, though, as he got severely burnt by the return of halloween candies.

I began pushing the clan towards running stat day care packages- basically, on any given stat day the clan would provide you with a set of 3 chow meins appropriate for that day. Lilian (#226144), mat and I made the idea happen…

This environment of helping out each other and interest in creating new projects kept a core of thriving players active in the clan while SexyGoddess was away. As things fell apart, we took up leadership of the clan, trying to organize and ready the revolution. When SG went boom, things were in place to pick up and get going again.

-Cool_Josh (#199060) – former member; currently in TUD. Cool_Josh was an active voice defending the distribution of Extra-Special Crimbo Stockings on Christmas 2004.

-DARK_LorD (#72457) – major clan administrator.

-soldout (#97538) – major clan administrator and new member helper. Now known as gretzky (#220421).

-syntaxes (#185714) – leader of the reconstituted Goddess’s Knights.

-Moxie Fruvius (#212601) – Moxie Fruvius was the player who announced TGK’s demise on the forums.

-PumpkinEve (#211236) – See Otori. TGK was her first clan.

-CrispEaterz (#156036) – humorous forum poster. Once singled out by Giboc as his “new favorite poster”.

-SteamedRhubarbFondue (playerid unknown) – Frequent trivia hoster, pre- /games channel.

-UberMigs (#144895) – Also known as Gunther McPhear (#153426). In the summer of 2004, UberMigs continued Seltz (#119430)’s tradition of antiraffles, which were a sort of protest against the common newbie scam raffles that clogged the mall and chat. In an antiraffle, the ticket would usually be some worthless item sold for below-autosell value; all entrants would won more than they ponied up in the first place. Regai (#193756) also was a latter-day antiraffle hoster.

-whitehatluck (#171357) – well-known forum poster.